Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”
my uncle: “that’s great”
Miley: “it’s a bird”
my uncle: “no its not”
They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.
she caught another bird.
update: she caught a squirrel today
She is gonna rule the world one day with this power
imagine if you named your kid dad. just dad.
Actually that’s just his nickname. His real name is [trucks honking], but everyone just calls him dad.
he predicts the future
wakey wakey eggs and bakey
but I’m a vegan
wakey wakey vegetables
the acceptance of her flaws is what made her flawless
Best backstory. (x)
You know…for a second there…his head shape led me to believe he could be Phineas’s father.
NO BUT THAT WOULD EXPLAIN WHY PHINEAS IS SO INVENTIVE OH MY GOD
next time you’re washing your hands next to somebody cup your hands under the tap until the water overflows then look at them dramatically and say ‘this water is getting out of hand’ it’s a guaranteed way to make friends i have never tried it but it is guaranteed
ok thank you that’s enough notes now you can stop
this is my favorite tweet of 2014